Happiness is Not a Fish that You Can Catch

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

The Three Day Countdown....

So, minor freak out. I have three days to completely organize my life for the remainder of the summer/upcoming school year. Here is where I stand: I have no job. I'm supposed to be moving out this weekend, but as of right now I have no place to go for the last two months of summer. I have no accommodations for the fall. I can't yet register for my classes because I have a hold on my account from some overdue music (which I still have to return). I haven't actually practiced my saxophone in 2 solid months. I have absolutely NO IDEA what I want to do with the rest of my life. I think that just about covers it.
Late last night, as I lay awake mentally scrolling through this list, I inadvertently set myself into a mini panic attack. I suddenly felt like very little of my life was in control. How, and why, had I let it get so bad? Was there any hope for a full recovery? I then realized how silly this sounded. I mean, really, I'm one of the luckiest kids in the world. I have everything I could ever want or need.
For starters, I have an amazing family. Granted, we're by no means without your typical dysfunction, but for the most part we are a tight-knit group. My family has always been there to support me in all my endeavors and are genuinely nice, caring, and considerate people. I am surrounded by wonderful friends, too, and besides having a great group of people with whom I associate, I am extremely lucky to have had the opportunity to attend university. I sometimes take this for granted and get carried away living the "university experience" instead of actually GOING to university (although I'm fairly certain I've now figured out a good balance between the two). There are, of course, a number of other things that make me feel very fortunate to be in the place I'm in today but to make my point (and I think there's one making it's way through), I really shouldn't sweat the small stuff. And after reevaluating the aforementioned list, I realized that it's all small stuff. Nothing that a little careful planning can't mend, right? So in order to get everything back on track I've started taking some action.
On the job front: I've applied to several places around town, keeping my eye out for places displaying "for hire" signs. I've got two potential sublets for the remainder of the summer. I've been searching the web a good portion of today hunting for places and have come up with some numbers to call. I will DEFINITELY go tomorrow, return my music, pay my fine, and register for classes. And after that, I will practice. I'll leave the future career decisions until later. I've got time. See, not so bad, eh? And to think, I've accomplished all this in one day!
And after all that, I'm fairly confident that I can say that everyone has had a similar experience to today's topic. So before you go and get all frazzled next time something seemingly unbearable presents itself, take a step back and ask yourself, "Is it really worth worrying about?" Most of the time you'll probably realize that things aren't as problamatic as they first appear. Worrying youself to the point of exhaustion is silly and unnecessary.
I suppose most people who end up reading this are going to think this was a completely useless post; for you it may have been, but for me it has been quite therapeutic. I sometimes feel the need to ramble endlessly (although I have managed to keep this fairly short) to ease some of the traffic that goes on in my brain. That is, afterall, the main purpose of this blog for me. Oh yeah, and when I figure out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life, I will post it here first.
Anyway, that's all for now. Buonna Notte!


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